Snail slime

Whatever happened to the good ol’ days when druggies were content to smoke a joint or snort a line?

Now some pinheads in Florida are swallowing snail snot.

No, that is not a misprint and you are not in a not a drug-induced hallucination. (At least I think you aren’t.)

Snail snot. (Or mucus, if you wanna be fancy.)

And not just any snail. We’re talking Giant African Snails that can grow up to 10 inches long and even eat plaster!

Ick.

You couldn’t pay me to get close to something that disgusting. But some Jim Jones-type has convinced his gullible followers to “do the goo” and, like, see God or something.

Only instead of achieving cosmic enlightenment, they were getting “violently ill, losing weight and developing strange lumps in their stomachs.”

Duh!

The first two are bad enough, but the “lumps in their stomachs” thing will really keep you up at night.

Haven’t any of these morons seen actor John Hurt's eating scene in the first Alien movie?