Wedding night surprise

When will people learn? Never buy a pig in a poke.

Or marry a woman you’ve never seen. The results could be hairy – literally.

An Arab ambassador, of all people, learned this lesson the hard way.

You see, he courted a woman who always remained hidden behind a veil that covered her face – a niqab, it’s called.

But after their expensive marriage in Dubai -- $137,000 for wedding gifts and expenses -- he found out why she kept the goods tucked away.

It wasn’t modesty. It was manliness.

The poor woman … has a beard! She apparently has some kind of hormonal deficiency. (Duh!)

To make things worse – if they can possibly get worse – she was cross-eyed too!

Not exactly a looker. Sort of what you might call a camel on two legs.

As you might expect, much anguish ensued.

The grossed-out groom demanded an annulment. The blushing bride was heartbroken too. (Heck, maybe Miss Sasquatch had a great figure and thought she made a heckuva catch!)

Anyway, I think we’ve all learned an important lesson here. Actually, two of 'em:

1) Marriage is like diplomacy: Trust but verify.

2) If your fiancée displays persistent curiosity in whether you prefer an electric shaver or straight razor, and whether you shave before your shower or afterward, and whether you prefer old-fashioned shaving cream or modern gel … dump her and go back to Match.com