How cold was it? Well, I’ll tell ya.
It was so cold in Washington yesterday that …
A senator known for his strong views on the environment told his limo driver, “I don’t care how much gas you use! Warm that damn thing up for 15 minutes before my butt hits the seat or you’ll be busing inmates to the federal prison!”
A federal researcher applied for a grant to study whether the true color of snow is white, off-white or pearl.
A congressman didn’t have any office visits from his constituents the entire day. Which caused him to tell his staff, “I wish we had more blizzards. It keeps those annoying voters out of my hair until I need them.”
The snow piled up so high outside the EPA offices that the head honchos couldn’t get out to attend a meeting on global warming.
A House chairman slipped and fell on the ice and suffered a bad bruise. Actually, it happened in the House bar, and it was ice that spilled from his drink, and he was sloshed. But technically, it still qualifies as a winter accident.
Sen. John McCain got cranky and snapped at anybody who talked to him. (OK, he’s like that most of the time, so scratch that one.)
Nancy Pelosi’s face was frozen solid and she couldn’t move a muscle. … (OK, it’s like that all the time from Botox, so scratch that one too.)
Thursday, February 11, 2010
How cold was it in D.C.?
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5 comments:
D.C. was so cold that the S.E.I.U. had to beat up people inside instead of out in the streets.
It was so cold that politicians put their hands in their OWN pockets.
It was so cold and snowy in D.C. that Dear Leader's Queen-Consort had to order on-line instead of flying a government airplane to Paris for a shopping trip.
It was so cold in D.C. that President Obama's heart was only half as warm as its usual 20 degrees.
Washington can't hold a candle to what's looking back at me outside my window. It warmed up to a whopping 20 degrees today, a regular heat wave, and the snow is piled up to my stackin'swivel. Thank you God for liquor stores.
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