Back in the saddle

I’m back, and Barry Bonds isn’t. Both things are good.

Yours truly returned to work and bloggerdom after a “hurrication.” A “hurrication,” of course, is a hurricane vacation.

That’s when you take off a week or two from work to fix up the ol’ homestead after a hurricane — so you can earn more money for next year’s hurricane repairs!

(I believe that’s what scientists call a “closed loop.” Or a sucker’s game. Whatever.)

Barry “BALCO” Bonds is in the news again, too.

The steroid slugger made a rare public appearance this week in San Fran, where he has been named the honorary chairman of that city’s Macy’s Christmas tree lighting.

I will ignore the fact that there has to be a better chairman no matter how much money Bonds has raised for the charity involved … and isn’t it a little early to be talking about Christmas (before Halloween!) … and I thought Macy’s was in New York.

No, my friends, the tasty morsel of this news brief was the claim from The Lyin’ King that he didn’t want to play baseball again.

“I’m happy now that I have more time,” Barry bleated. “I had fun. But I like my freedom.”

What a crock!

He wanted to play so desperately this year that he was begging any team to sign him for a rookie’s minimum salary, which barely covers his pharmaceutical bill.

And when he appeared at an event in in the Giants ballpark this summer, he pointedly declared, “I haven't retired.”

Whatever else happened in baseball this year, the season was a resounding success. Why? Because the free-agent home-run leader was not signed by any other team since A) he has a federal indictment hanging over him, and B) he is a loathsome person.

If the conclusion of his trial next spring ends with a guilty verdict, next year will be off to a great start too!