Cards for cons

Is this a great country or what?

An entrepreneur in Los Angeles has found a new niche in the greeting card business. Attorney Terrye L. Cheathem has formed Three Squares Greetings, which provides cards for inmates in jails and prisons.

Leaving aside any jokes about an attorney with the last name of “Cheathem,” this is a terrific idea. You have no shortage in your targeted demographic — 2.5 million of ’em. And trust me, we are talking about a captive audience.

Cheathem said she thought of the idea when she was looking for a greeting card for her brother-in-law, who, shall we say, was a guest of the state for 11 months.

Not surprisingly, she couldn’t find any cards on the outside aimed at folks on the inside.

So she founded Three Squares, with expressions like, “We are all praying for you while you do your time.”

Or, “You had the choice to be ‘naughty or nice.’ And you chose ... Oh well, now you have to do your time.”

Those are good, but I think Terrye needs to branch out. Like:

“We hope all is going well for you. We can’t wait for you to get out … and run off a new batch of 10s and 20s.”

“Don’t give up! 2045 will be here sooner than you think!”

“We are looking forward to your release date. … In the meantime, where did you bury the you-know-what from the bank job?”

“I know you’ve been away for a while, and when you get out you’re going to love all the new advances like flying cars, vacations to the moon and the three-day workweek. … Hey, just kidding!”

“Since you’re out of circulation, I didn’t think you’d mind if I used your car, your boat, your four-wheeler and your record collection. … Oh, and your wife and I are getting to know each other too.”