Joe's gone wild

HEADING OFF FOR A WEEK OF VACATION, BUT HERE’S A QUICK POST:

When it comes to criminals, I’m a lock-’em-up-and-throw-away-the-key kind of guy.

People who hurt or steal from other folks are pretty low on the food chain. If they do something seriously bad, they deserve to spend many, many days looking at the world through a set of iron bars.

But I will say this too: They should be treated OK while they are guests of the taxpayers.

That’s three meals a day, a shower every now and then and a little exercise to burn up some energy. No rough stuff from guards or other inmates.

Which brings us to Joe Francis, the guy who made millions upon millions by convincing college girls on spring break to flash for his cameras. Yes, we’re talking “Girls Gone Wild.”

It’s hard to believe any gal would be that stupid or slutty, but it happens.

Anyhow, Francis has managed to find himself on the wrong side of the law — tax evasion, contempt of court, having contraband in custody. And in more than one state, no less. What a schmuck.

While in a jail in Chickasha, Okla., recently, he said guards denied him food and blankets. And threatened to strap him naked to a chair for 48 hours.

It sounds crazy, and the guards deny it.

All I know is that if somehow, some way, this creep could be convicted for a stupid white-collar stunt like tax evasion, it would be sweet justice.

Why? Because what he did to get rich was not illegal. But it was incredibly sleazy.

There ought to be a penalty for it, but there isn’t. So I wouldn’t mind settling for some kind of secondary, after-the-fact conviction.

One more thing: When he goes to trial, I hope he gets a jury filled with men and women who have teen-aged daughters. Little Joey would then learn all about "Justice Gone Wild!"