Do the crime, do (some of) the time

If you’re planning to go to Arizona and break the law, you should try to end up before Judge Helene Abrams. If you do, let’s just say you don’t have to worry about dying behind bars.

Abrams is the Superior Court judge who gave perennial screwup Mike Tyson all of one day in jail for possession of cocaine and driving under the influence.

Tyson could have gotten four years and three months. The prosecutor even recommended a year in the slammer, and that seems generous.

Instead Iron Mike gets 24 hours. Heck, you don’t even have to eat lousy jail food or endure those unpleasant showers with other inmates if you’re in for that much.

Worse, Judge Abrams pumped up Tyson with some undeserved praise: “You’ve worked to address your addiction and self-destructive behavior,” she gushed.

I’ll believe it when I see it. So far, Mikey seems to be pretty good at addiction and self-destructive behavior.

As prosecutor Shane Krauser pointed out, Tyson’s run-ins with the law include convictions for rape in Indiana and assault in Maryland.

“Judge, by my calculations, this is his fourth or fifth chance,” he said.

Sheesh.

And we wonder why we have a crime problem in this country.

I don’t have all the answers, but one problem might be ridiculous sentences like 82 minutes to Nicole Richie, 84 minutes to Lindsay Lohan and one day to Mike Tyson for serious offenses that could have hurt or killed someone.

Oh, well. Maybe Tyson will get the book thrown at him the next time. And trust me, there will be a next time.