Call of the wild

It’s one of those sad/bizarre stories you come across every few months: A deranged or misguided person goes to a zoo and gets into a cage with an animal … and gets killed.

Part of you is thinking, “Gee, that’s too bad.” And let’s be honest, part of you is thinking, “What did they think would happen? A Dr. Doolittle moment?”

The latest incident: A woman in northern Belgium got into a cage with cheetahs last weekend at the Olmense Zoo. Karen Aerts, 37, of Antwerp, was found dead on Monday, according to the Associated Press.

Police said they had ruled out foul play. (Good call, Inspector Clouseau!)

Aerts apparently was an animal lover. An extreme animal lover.

She had “adopted” one of the cheetahs in question — Bongo, for those who care — and even paid for the big cat’s food. She apparently hid out in the zoo after it closed on Sunday and found the keys to the cheetahs’ cage.

No problem — so far. The problem occurred with the statement issued by zoo spokesman Jan Libot.

“Karen loved animals. Unfortunately the cheetahs betrayed her trust.”

Huh? Betrayed her trust? Has Mr. Libot been cleaning out too many cages without proper ventilation?

The cheetahs did not “betray” anything. The bond that the confused woman apparently felt she shared with the cats existed only in her mind. The cheetahs were not her pets or her friends. They were wild animals — and predators at that, with claws and fangs. When she entered their cage, they reacted like wild animals.

Worse yet, an animal rights group called GAIA now wants the zoo to be closed, calling it unsafe for animals and visitors.

To be honest, I don’t know the zoo’s safety record. But I’m willing to go out on a limb here and venture that if you stay out of the critters’ cages … your chances of going home in one piece are probably pretty good.